The holidays are a magical time – unless you’re a firefighter. Then it’s just one big eggnog-flavored stress test. Between managing nonstop emergencies and dodging tinsel-wrapped meltdowns, it’s enough to make even the jolliest of us say, “Bah, humbug!” But fear not! Here are nine practical and mildly absurd ways to tackle holiday stress head-on.
1. Silent Night Stakes
When the radio won’t stop screaming and the ladder won’t stop creaking, it’s time for some high-stakes holiday fun. Compete with your partner to see who can go the longest without swearing during a tense shift. Loser buys coffee and orders a venti holiday monstrosity with extra sprinkles, all while using a Christmas “elf name” chosen by their partner. Bonus points if the barista shouts, “Here’s your peppermint latte, Sprinkles McJinglebottom!” with a straight face.
2. Caffeine Elf Olympics
The coffee runs thick this time of year – because no one saves Christmas on decaf. Turn your caffeine addiction into a sport by balancing cups in the wildest spots during bumpy rides. Cup on the dashboard? Amateur hour. Mug perched on the nozzle of a firehose? Now we’re talking. Photos or it didn’t happen. Just don’t blame us when the battalion chief finds his holiday roast dripping from the ceiling.
3. Gas Station Christmas Trees
Few things scream “holiday spirit” like a gas station Santa in July attire. During your inevitable fuel stops, vote on the best—or worst—holiday decorations you encounter. Bonus points for inflatable Santas wrestling reindeer or any display that looks like it barely survived a chimney fire. Winner gets bragging rights and loser gets to buy snacks for the team. No, jerky doesn’t count as a Christmas gift.
4. Gingerbread Warzones
When it comes to holiday downtime, you’ve got two options: build morale or demolish it creatively. Construct gingerbread replicas of the station out of saltines, frosting, and whatever candy is lying around. Then, obliterate them in the most dramatic way possible. Axes, hoses, or a very enthusiastic “accidental” elbow—anything goes. It’s demolition meets dessert.
5. Stocking Stuffer Stealth
Nothing says “I care” like sneaking surprises into a teammate’s gear bag mid-shift. Whether it’s a miniature candy cane or a note that says, “You’re the fire extinguisher to my dumpster fire,” small gestures go a long way. Bonus: watching them find it while muttering, “Who’s the Grinch leaving sugar in my boots?”
6. Parking Patrol Bingo
The holiday shopping frenzy makes people forget basic parking laws—and common sense. Keep your sanity during emergency runs by turning this chaos into a game. Create a bingo card featuring absurd parking scenarios: cars double-parked across five spots, vehicles abandoned on sidewalks, or the classic “mall Santa took my space.” Shout “BINGO!” over the comms to really confuse the rookie.
7. Chimney Rescue Roleplay
Put a festive spin on training drills by staging a “Santa rescue” from a stuck chimney. Use the rookie as Santa (bonus if they’re already grumpy), and let the crew figure out the safest and most ridiculous way to “extract” them. Think of it as both a bonding exercise and a chance to blow off steam—because nothing says teamwork like hoisting someone out of a duct while they grumble about missing their eggnog.
8. Cookie Roulette
Because firefighting doesn’t involve enough risk, introduce holiday cookie roulette. Each person brings a batch of homemade cookies to the station—one secretly loaded with an ungodly amount of cayenne pepper or salt. Just try not to choke on laughter when the lieutenant’s “chocolate chip” tastes suspiciously like spicy regret.
9. Radio Holiday Karaoke
When the calls finally slow down, hijack the station radio for a little holiday karaoke. Nothing bonds a crew faster than belting out an off-key rendition of “Jingle Bell Rock.” Bonus points for anyone who slips in firefighting-themed lyrics. “Dashing through the snow / To a hydrant that’s now froze…” You get the idea.
Final Thoughts
The holidays aren’t all joy and gingerbread for firefighters, but they can be bearable (and maybe even fun) with a dash of creativity and chaos. And you don’t have to tackle them without a plan – whether it’s managing stress or planning for the future. While you’re in the spirit of preparation, check out CAPF’s LTD plans. Securing peace of mind now means you can focus on what matters: saving the day (and maybe saving Santa).
So with your plans in toe, grab your elf hat, caffeinate responsibly, and remember: you’re not just putting out fires—you’re lighting up spirits (hopefully not literally). Stay safe, stay snarky, and may your silent nights be mostly swearing-free.